I just can't take it

Okay .... last night I worked (7-7) and I had the nursery. No biggie ... I love working with the babies. So I get a page, call right back and find out they have a new admit to the "special care nursery". Okay ... so up I go. (I was in the department, to get to the scn you go out of the department and down the hall and up ONE flight of stairs, then down another hall .... SHORT trip) So anyway, I get there and this nurse (we'll just call her stupid for her privacy) was there ... as soon as I walk in she looks up at me as she is struggling with the flow meter and nasal canula and said I'm getting this on him since you took so long to get up here!!!! Okay ... I bite my tongue and ignore it (we've butted heads before). I continue to walk over and say, so what do we have. The nurse that has the baby STARTS to tell me and STUPID says "I need that thing". Ummm, okay ... that thing, right on it! I look at her and say what thing? "You know that thing in the back" Okay ... getting EXTREMELY frustrated here!!! I start naming off THINGS that she might be talking about and she's getting mad and giving me smart remarks because I can't read her mind! Finaly she says, I need to measure the o2 he's on. Okay ... thanks for the tid bit of info there. So I figure she wants a hood .... it's measurable and concentrated. So I go get it, come back with the set up and STUPID said, I didn't ask for that, I just need a bag and an analyzer. So again, I bite my tongue and go back, get a bag (she had an analyzer but wasn't aware of it). I hook it all up and everything is fine. Well, not fine ... I had to switch everything STUPID did so I could analyze the O2, but it was fine.

So this happens around 430AM ... luckily towards the end of the shift. I spend a lot of time up in the scn with the baby during the procedures (spinal taps, etc) to keep check on the sats. (I won't even tell you about STUPID blocking his airway during the tap).

So finally the time comes to go home .... I give report, I go to the locker room and get my stuff to leave and it hits me ... PANIC ATTACK!!!! I sit down for a minute but afraid someone might see me ... so I hurry to the elevator and out of the building crying and shaking .... a little dizzy too. I get to my car and could do nothing but cry and shake!!! There was no way I could drive home, so I had to call and have Bart come and get me! How sad is that!?! Being the great husband he is, he didn't mind one bit and comforted me on the phone until he got there. I felt like such an idiot. I guess it was a combination of that STUPID NURSE getting to me and I forgot to take my meds that night while I was at work.